This podcast playlist was curated by Adela Mizrachi, founder of Podcast Brunch Club and leader of the PBC-Chicago chapter.
Dating. Ugh. What can I say? I’ve done it. I hated it. As a woman who dated into her late 30s, I can say from experience that it’s rough out there! But, dating was a means to an end: finding love. Love was lurking out there somewhere–I just needed to find it, pin it down, and make it submit to my will. It was a painstaking task involving many awkward encounters. It was a dance. A game. I endured all this, for what? To find love. To find that person who completes me…or completes most of me (hey….I have relatively reasonable expectations here!). As I was going through the process, I was consoled by listening to podcasts about dating and the trials and tribulations encountered by others like me. And, it always made me feel better to understand the science and history behind dating. So, in honor of the sometimes adored, sometimes abhorred Valentine’s Day, let’s dive into looking for love this month.
Podcast Playlist on Looking for Love
Curiosity Podcast – The Past, Present, And Future of Dating
(Apple Podcasts | Google Play // 48 minutes, September 2017)
The dating world has radically transformed over the last few decades. Combine advances in technology with radical changes in social roles and a rise in non-traditional relationships and sexual preferences, and you end up with a pretty confusing dating environment. Dr. Eli Finkel joins the Curiosity Podcast to discuss everything from one-night stands to Tinder to pickup artists – and everything in-between. Here are some links to the articles/talks mentioned in the podcast: Dr. Finkel’s NYT article, “In Defense of Tinder”; Dr. Finkel’s TEDx Talk, “Can Technology Bring Us True Love?”; and Dr. Finkel’s website.
Dear Sugars – Looking for the One, Part 2: The Reality
(Apple Podcasts | Google Play // 51 minutes, January 2016)
The Sugars have been avoiding the most frequently asked question they receive from women: Will I ever find the one? In the first episode, they explored the anxieties around that question. In Part 2, they focus on a particular anxiety that comes up over and over in letters from advice-seekers who have begun to question their past and present relationship decisions — should I settle?
Rough Translation – The Refugee’s Dating Coach
(Apple Podcasts // 40 minutes, September 2017)
A Syrian refugee in Berlin hopes to find love but is stumped by German dating codes and is terrified of crossing the line between flirting and harassing. A professional ‘flirt coach’ steps in to be his guide.
[OPTIONAL] Hidden Brain – Aziz Ansari on Modern Love
(Apple Podcasts | Google Play // 27 minutes, November 2015)
Curator’s note: I struggled with whether to include this episode given the recent news about Aziz Ansari. In the episode, he makes a lot of good points about dating and the book was co-written with a sociology professor from NYU. But, I definitely don’t want to make things uncomfortable for anyone. Ultimately, I decided to let the PBC community decide by posting it as a poll on the PBC Facebook Group. The final tally was 24:8 in favor of keeping it on the list. There were some good points and proposed compromises made in the comments, so I’ve decided to leave it on as an optional listening. Individual chapters can decide how/whether they will discuss the episode.
Hidden Brain host Shankar Vedantam talks to comedian Aziz Ansari — star of the Netflix show ‘Master of None’ and coauthor of Modern Romance — about Tinder, texting and how dating is a bit like… buying jam.
Conversation Starters about the Looking for Love Podcast Playlist
- Do you think people rely too much on technology for finding love?
- Eli Finkel says that online dating is really online meeting and that dating itself hasn’t changed much. Do you agree?
- From your own perspective, do you notice the scarcity of available men that was conveyed in the Dear Sugars episode? If you had to compare how many eligible women vs eligible men you knew, how would those numbers compare?
- How much does culture play a role in dating?
- The paradox of choice concept has often been used to describe retail experience. But, in the Hidden Brain episode, Aziz Ansari relates it to dating. Do you think this is accurate? Is it actually happening in the dating world?
- In the Dear Sugars episode, did you feel the ultimate takeaway from the guest was that women should settle or did you feel his ultimate message was more nuanced?
DJ RuggedAngel’s Music Playlist
Take a break from listening to podcasts, and get your groove on with some music. Our very own DJ RuggedAngel put together this “Dating” music playlist especially for PBC.